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Feb 2, 2008.  My cousin and 3 of his friends jumped in a minivan to go shopping.  They heard that it was faster to get there if they drove on the ice road.  They did.  Somehow, they got lost and ended up off the road.  They went through the ice.  The two people in the front got out, but my cousin and the girl in the back did not.  Child locks were on on the sliding doors.

I flew back here for the funeral.  It was hard.  I didnt know him well and I feel guilty about that.  My Dad is his uncle and because of my parent's split, I didnt get to know that side of the family.  Facebook got me in touch with him and alot of my other cousins and family and I tired slowly to get to know them this way.  There are a few I am close with and I ended up having to break the news to them - they grew up in pretty close contact with him and that was hard for me to do.

When I was in the Toronto airport waiting for my flight home and I felt a pair of eyes on me.  This hat.  It was on a rack in a souvenier shop screaming at me (figureatively! LOL) to buy it.  Of course I had to - my cousin had one just like it.

So every Feb 2 I wear the hat, and I make sure to contact every single cousin I have - even ones I have never met (and there are a few I havent except for FB) and just touch base and see how life is treating them.  I didnt do this as often before Feb 2008.  Especially with Paul.  We really had nothing in common, and I didnt know what to say.  I saw him when he was about 4, and then not again until he was 22ish,a nd I know thats not my fault, but now I'll never know him...